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Shidduch: Jewish Dating
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Datng a Ketubah Jewissh as our government issues dzting marriage license, Jewish law has historically used a ketubah to sanction a marriage. Many contemporary couples choose to veer away from the traditional ketubah text and its jewis. and instead choose a text that expresses their hopes and commitments for their marriage. Some couples write their own text, while others search for a text that speaks to their vision. Historically, the ketubah is not only a legal document, but also an artistic one. Ketubot [plural of ketubah] have long been—and continue to be—an expression of Jewish creativity. So couples not only have decisions to make about the text, but also the kind of art they want for their ketubah.
Some couples shop together for a lithograph; others hire an artist to create an original design. Couples should also think about who they want to invite to sign their ketubah. Traditionally, a witness must be a religiously observant Jewish male, unrelated to the bride or groom. Reform and Reconstructionist and some Conservative rabbis accept women as witnesses, though most still prefer that the witness be Jewish. Selecting a Chuppah The chuppah is the canopy that covers the bride and groom during the wedding ceremony, creating a sacred space that is both open for all to see and private and intimate for the couple beneath it.
It symbolizes their new home together, and is said to be open as was the tent of Abraham and Sarah, who were always ready to receive visitors. The blessings are also recited over a full cup of wine. The blessings begin with praising G-d for His creation in general and creation of the human being and proceed with praise for the creation of the human as a "two part creature," woman and man. The blessings express the hope that the new couple will rejoice together forever as though they are the original couple, Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden. The blessings also include a prayer that Jerusalem will be fully rebuilt and restored with the Temple in its midst and the Jewish people within her gates.
At this point the couple again share in drinking the cup of wine, and the groom breaks a glass by stamping on it. This custom dates back to Talmudic times, and symbolizes the idea of our keeping Jerusalem and Israel in our minds even at times of our joy.
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Just as the Temple in Jerusalem is destroyed, so we break a utensil to show our identification with Jewixh sorrow of Jewiwh exile. The verse, "If I forget thee O' Jerusalem, let my right hand weddjng its cunning: If I do not raise thee over my own joy, let my tongue cleave to the roof of my mouth", is sometimes recited at this point. With the breaking of the glass the band plays, and the guests usually break out into dancing and cries of "Mazaltov! The ketubah is the property of the kallah and she must have access to it throughout their marriage. It is often written amidst beautiful artwork, to be framed and displayed in the home.
The theme of these blessings links the chatan and kallah to our faith in God as Creator of the world, Bestower of joy and love, and the ultimate Redeemer of our people.
The niddah jewwish are regarded as an attractive part of unforeseen initiate rather than just used with women. It is often soluble aside beautiful artwork, to be enlightened and personal in the needs.
These blessings are recited by the rabbi or other people that the families wish to honor. At the conclusion of the seven blessings, the chatan and kallah again drink some of the wine. Breaking the Glass A glass is now placed on the floor, and the chatan shatters it with his foot. This serves as an expression of sadness at the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, and identifies the couple with the spiritual and national destiny of the Jewish people. A Jew, even at the moment of greatest rejoicing, is mindful of the Psalmist's injunction to "set Jerusalem above my highest joy.
Sefardim always break the glass at the end of the ceremony, even in Israel. This marks the conclusion of the ceremony. With shouts of "Mazel Tov," the chatan and kallah are then given an enthusiastic reception from the guests as they leave the chuppah together.
Yichud The couple is then escorted to a private "yichud room" and left alone for a few minutes. Even if she was warned, but did not acknowledge those facts immediately upon hearing them, and immediately before doing the ejwish, she is not put to death. These conditions apply dxting all death-penalty convictions. Niddah The jswish. of "family purity" tehorat hamishpacha are considered an important part of an Orthodox Jewish marriage, and adherence to them is in Orthodox Judaism regarded as a prerequisite of marriage. This involves observance of the various details of the menstrual niddah laws.
Orthodox brides and grooms attend classes on this subject prior to the wedding. The niddah laws are regarded as an intrinsic part of marital life rather than just associated with women. Together with a few other rules, including those about the ejaculation of sementhese are collectively termed "family purity". Sexual relations[ edit ] In marriage, conjugal relations are guaranteed as a fundamental right for a woman, along with food and clothing. Marriage is not solely, or even primarily, for the purpose of procreation. Traditional sources recognize that companionship, love and intimacy are the primary purposes of marriage, noting that woman was created in Gen.
According to the Torah and the Talmuda man was permitted to marry more than one wife, but a woman could not marry more than one man. Although polygyny was permitted, it was never common. The Talmud never mentions any rabbi with more than one wife. Around C. It continued to be permitted for Sephardic Jews in Islamic lands for many years. To the present day, Yemenite and Ethiopian Jews continue to practice polygyny; however, the modern state of Israel allows only one wife. Those who move to Israel with more than one wife are permitted to remain married to all of the existing wives, but cannot marry additional ones.
A husband is responsible for providing his wife with food, clothing and sexual relations Ex.
jjewish Marital sexual relations are the woman's right, not jesish. man's. A man cannot force his jeeish to engage in sexual relations with him, nor is he permitted to datinb his wife in any way a practice routinely permitted in Western countries until quite recently. A married woman retains ownership of any property she brought to the marriage, but the husband has the right to manage the property and to enjoy profits from the property. Prohibited Marriages and Daitng Children The minimum age for marriage under Jewish law is 13 for boys, 12 datinh girls; however, the kiddushin can take place before that, and often did in medieval times. The Talmud recommends that a man marry at jeqish.
18, or somewhere between 16 and The Torah sets forth a laundry list of prohibited relations. Such marriages are never valid. A man cannot marry certain close blood relatives, the ex-wives of certain close blood relatives, a woman who has not been validly divorced from her previous husband, the daughter or granddaughter of his ex-wife, or the sister of his ex-wife during the ex-wife's life time. For a complete list, see Mitzvot Commandments. The offspring of forbidden marriages are mamzerim bastards, illegitimateand subject to a variety of restrictions; however it is important to note that only the offspring of these incestuous or forbidden marriages are mamzerim.
Children born out of wedlock are not mamzerim in Jewish law and bear no stigma, unless the marriage would have been prohibited for the reasons above. Children of a married man and a woman who is not his wife are not mamzerim because the marriage between the parents would not have been prohibitedalthough children of a married woman and a man who is not her husband are mamzerim because she could not have married him. There are other classes of marriages that are not permitted, but that are valid if they occur and that do not make the children mamzerim. The marriage of minors, of a Jew to a non-Jew, and of a kohein to the prohibited classes of women discussed below fall into this category.